What does my family look like today? Incomplete. It will forever and always look incomplete because we will always be missing a child. I hate taking pictures of all of us together because it is one more silent reminder that my son is not here with me. When we know that there is a family picture we will prepare and bring our Corby bear with us, but if one is sprung on us then I try to avoid it being taken.
I'm ok with having pictures taken of us individually but not all of us together. We had the bear made out of one of Corby's blankets, but not everyone knows that is what the bear represents so we also choose to have pictures taken with his actual picture. When people see that family picture they aren't sure what to say.
The family picture that represents us the best now is this one.
It shows that Corby is still in our family, but not fully with us.
Who is my family to me? They are my everything. They are the air that I need to survive. They are each their unique selves that make me whole as a wife and mother. Each member of my family in their own way makes us a complete family. They are the beauty in my life. Without them I am not me. I no longer am a mother to three children or a wife to a wonderful man.
What do they mean to me? More than I can ever express in words. I live because of them. I wake up each day because of them. I miss my son so much because of how much I loved and adored him. I feel like I'm not completely living because he's not here. I need my family. I need my son. My family will forever feel empty. I will forever have the feeling that I am missing a child. I am grateful for my faith and knowing that I will be with my son again.
This picture depicts that very well.
I am grateful for eternal families and I can hold onto that piece to help me make it through this journey until I am with my son again.
1 comment:
I love those pictures! Man you guys make cute kids!!!
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